Happy Birthday, Henry Rollins!

Today is the 52nd birthday of musician/actor/”poet” Henry Rollins. Here are some fun facts about Hank you should know:

  1. Hank’s real name is Henry Garfield, which he changed because he also haaaaates Mondays.
  2. Hank was born without a sense of self-awareness. It’s a rare disease that doctors call Rollinsons Disease.
  3. Years ago, Hank worked in an ice cream shop with Ian Mackaye. They still own it to this day and serve free ice cream to inner city straight edge youths.
  4. Hank is a big fan of lifting weights. He even owns a pair of “night dumbells” which allow him to do bicep curls in his dreams.
  5. Hank sleeps with his eyes open.
  6. Hank is known for performing in his trademark gym shorts. He has not taken them off, even to wash them, since 1984. Many believe they are the source of his super human strength.
  7. Hank has appeared in several movies. He has played a cop, a police office, a security guard, a corrections officer, and another kind of cop.
  8. The shape of Hank’s head was the inspiration for the design of the character Wall-E.
  9. Hank is a very generous man and lets a Hispanic family of four live rent-free in his chin cleft.
  10. Hank has never had a bowel movement. He doesn’t believe in them.

Feel free to leave your favorite Rollins facts/memories in the comments.


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